Drive Slower

I swear can old people drive any slower? I could walk faster then these people drive. Do they think because they can’t walk fast means they have to drive slowly?



I swear every time I see an old person in front of me I am ever so tempted just to ram the ass of their card so they can go 20 MPH instead of 5 MPH. I know I know that would never work but I know what would every old person must put a cable on the front of their car and when someone passes them they hook onto the car in front of them and problem solve.


Now the voices have another idea. Every non old person car should be equipped with a rocket launcher and if old people are driving to slow just blow them off the road WHOO that would be so cool kinda like fireworks.


Off to the military store hope the voices have a plan to get some money. Oh look a bank.

SHOULDER

I don’t think it’s a very hard concept but maybe that’s because I am of superior intelligence of all the dumbass bike riders out there.


I enjoy bike riding it’s an easy way to run (well ride) away from the multiple voices coming from my head, but is it so hard to stay on the shoulder of the road when riding your bike? Every time I pass someone that’s riding their bike and is not even close to the shoulder of the road I just want to “sneeze” so my hands jerk into the dumbasses direction and cause some brain damage because I think that would make these people smarter.


What really gets me close to running these people off the road is when they look back at you and keep going almost in the middle of the street I just want to slam the gas and run them down but that would mean another trip to the mental hospital.


One of these days I am going to listen to the voices in my head and ram these dummies of the road and just laugh my ass off they are so damn stupid.


Me and the voices are going to go for walk together with a baseball bat so I wouldn’t come near me.